I wonder if he really only wanted to do it because of the abandonment he knows he made me feel when he was absent after his phone broke? If so...well let's not go there. Overthink land is teh blow.

I hate being without a companion anymore.


( Read more... )

I wanna smash this boy so bad that I feel as ripe as a mango about to fall off a tree. We got everything out of the way and instead of brushing me off, he just said ok when I said I'm gonna keep perving on him til I work it out of my system. Idk what's wrong with me. He's just so fucking tasty and I want more. How dare he keep himself from me.

I'm ( Read more... )

Because I've asked before if he trusted me and he said yes. I asked if he was sure. Either he's always stressed in the moment or he's just a fucking liar. I can't deal. This is gonna happen today. Breezy is on board.

Was being the keyword but whatever. I love this song

Ellie Goulding - Midas TouchYou say you're going through changesEvery day it seems your life is up and downAnd you say that you're looking for an answerEverywhere you look it seems it can't be foundLike searching, trying to find the rainbowNo one's ever found it, yet it's told to beBut if you're ( Read more... )

Breezy said that maybe I'm so fucking twisted inside out because "you can't save everyone."

Maybe she was right.

I'm tired of doing this with you. I'm tired of being the friend I thought you could use only for you to completely disregard my feelings. You make me feel like shit. If you don't know me well enough, maybe you shouldn't come around me anymore. I only have time for people who value and appreciate the friendship that I have to offer. I realize that ( Read more... )

So Breezy took the initiative and confronted Niel about why he doesn't talk to me. She straight asks him "How come you can talk to me and Julia but you can't talk to Erika?" And he replies with a FUCKING "Idk maybe because I don't know her like that." Which is definitely one of the worst things I THINK someone I considered one of my BESTfriends to ( Read more... )

I manipulate my friends for my own amusement and emotionally detach myself without notice. Seriously, folks have no idea how easy it is for me to cut a bitch off and not fucks with u.

I keep telling people to stop getting involved with me because I'm crazy and dangerous but they must think of me as alluring. I'm so nefarious, ima just go over here ( Read more... )

I was having this funky dream. Isiah was there. Some girl, I can't remember at the moment but Danny was in my dream as well. Let's just say it ended with me waking myself up with that "omg I'm already late for work" feeling even tho I'm off. It was disturbing.

I don't wanna dream about Niel. I don't wanna go thru that process again. So while I try ( Read more... )

So Niel effectively friendzoned me. I might talk about it in length during another post but today is the 2nd day of properly recovering- and putting those feelings, the rejection, shit that I shouldn't be worried about, shit that frustrates, aggravates and drives me crazy concerning any of that situation-and stuffing all that into my "I don't care ( Read more... )